Secondhand Lions (2003)

The first review was okay, I've actually yet to finish it. My writing leaves much to be desired, but I suppose that is why I am typing here today.

Today's review is for a pleasant family film I saw some years ago that stood out in my mind for two reasons: 1) Michael Caine is the shit, and 2) Haley Joel Osment is (was) a great child actor.

If you want to know the truth behind why I typed those two thoughts, I will provide an explanation here (disclaimer: one of these truths is more relevant and worthwhile than the other). Michael Caine is cool because he has a british accent, and he never ages. I expect to be 100 years old and Michael Caine will still look 50. As for the second piece of reasoning, Haley approaches his roles (which were consistently that of the misunderstanding naive child) not like a typical child. He played his parts as if he lacked a basic understanding of how one should act around people. Re-watch (or if you are lame, watch for the first time) Artificial Intelligence and The Sixth Sense. He plays the exact same kid.

There are very few child actors I genuinely like(d). Osment was one. For the record, Shia LaBeouf is another.

Anyway, its 11:00pm and I need to complete community service early tomorrow morning. I will finish this review (if you can call it that) with my basic point system:

Substance: 7/10

Style: 6/10

Substance Consistency: 8/10

Stylistic Consistency: 8/10

Overall: 6/10